Blessed

 

The lyrics below, from an old Kenny Chesney song written by Mac McAnally, are a powerful reminder. Perspective is everything.

Knowing where you are, and being grateful for it, is a key to happiness. The lessons we learn along the way fuel our growth and guide our journey forward.

“Maybe what you have ain’t what you wanted

Where you are ain’t where you want to be”

“Every day is a blessing to be counted

Every night is a lesson to be learned”

     Island Rain – Kenny Chesney

Decisions

 

Recently I read an interesting perspective on decision making. Consider this…

People think good decision-making is about being right all the time. It’s not. It’s about lowering the cost of being wrong.

When the cost of mistakes is high, we’re paralyzed with fear. When the cost of mistakes is low, we can move fast and adapt.

Make mistakes cheap, not rare.

*Taken from Farnan Street Blog

Wisdom

 

I don’t know about you, but I pray for wisdom every day. I believe that God grants wisdom. But we also earn it, or gain it, through life experiences. Some of us are better than others at turning life experiences into wisdom.

What if we had wisdom much earlier in life? Imagine navigating friendships, choices, and mistakes with the perspective we gain over time. Less worried about fitting in, more focused on what truly matters. We might have stressed less over things that didn’t last and appreciated simple moments more. But maybe growing up is part of God’s plan, it is meant to be messy and uncertain, so we must earn that wisdom the hard way.

“Wisdom in your teens would be a lot less fun”

-       Taken from the Luke Bryan song – “Most People Are Good”

If we knew then, what we know now…

Perspective

 

This is not the first MMM with this title! Have you ever thought about the relationship between gratitude and perspective? Often when I am grumpy or down, the best medicine for me is perspective. Are the issues going on in my life, at that moment, really all that bad? I need to stop, look around, and remind myself of all I have to be grateful for. There is suffering, children that need a safe place, veterans that need medical/emotional care, and people without food or shelter. Most of those things I don’t have to worry about! Gratitude…

Often, we get so caught up in our own drama that we forget how good life is, or can be. Perhaps the next time you feel frustrated, annoyed, or even self-loathing consider one or two things you are grateful for in your life. It is amazing how that puts things into perspective for you.

A Lecture…

 

“Don’t offer a lecture to a person that needs a hug!”

-        Anonymous

We humans can be a bit judgy. Many of us are set in our ways and view the world from only our perspective. We think we have all the answers. The problem is when we feel the need to press our answers onto others. These lectures might be about how others should live their life, who they should date, how to parent, or what they need to tell their boss. Sure, there is a place for these discussions with our friends. Note the use of the word discussion, not lecture. But, oftentimes people just need a sympathetic ear. They need to be listened to, not lectured to. Think about the difference. Big opportunity here for both parents and employers.

Sometimes, friends, employees and kids may actually want to know our thoughts. Other times they may even need to hear our thoughts. But there are also times when we need to keep our mouth shut. Never pass up the opportunity to give someone a hug. It might be all they need.

Perception is reality

 

Good Monday morning, or is it Tuesday?  Or maybe a Tuesday that seems like Monday? 

 

Often perception is reality and for that reason today may feel like Monday all day.  In reality it is not. It is the Monday of this work week for us, and I hope your Memorial Day holiday was fabulous.

 

Perceptions becoming reality can be hard to understand especially if you are a black and white factual personality. It is important to remember that how people perceive situations and perceive other people often forms the realities of how they think.  If you deal with people, and we all do, you will always be dealing with their individual perceptions. Oftentimes, it does not matter what you think or what the facts may be.  People have their own perspective, that does not make them wrong, just unique in their viewpoint.

 

Have a great day...(Monday or Tuesday or whatever day you perceive it to be)

A Reminder…

I have had a chance to do some pondering lately.  It is not something I do well, or often.  None of these thoughts are new or different, but they are great reminders of maintaining perspective.  Make sure your life includes a healthy mix of the following… 

• Get outside and enjoy God’s handiwork
• Take time off and unplug
• Do something you have never done
• Thank those on your team that enable you to take time off and unplug
• Spend quality time with great friends
• Meet new friends
• Discover new places
• Be part of something that positively impacts others
• Protect and cherish your health
• Spend time around a table…  tell stories, share ideas, challenge thoughts, make memories

Leadership

Many of you know that leadership is one of my favorite discussion topics.  Here is another interesting quote regarding the challenge of leadership.

He who thinks he leads but has no followers is only taking a walk.

That statement places leadership in a little different perspective to me.  Leadership is not leadership without followers.  What is a leader without followers?  Well, they likely are not a leader at all.  In our different leadership roles, we should think about “Being a person that others will want to follow.”   We are not leaders in all the roles in our lives, we are followers in some and leaders in others.  The key is that when we are in our leadership roles to not forget the viewpoint of the follower.  I don’t know about you, but I would like to think that I am here for more than just a walk!

Choose Growth

Personal growth occurs only when we are challenged.  It is in those moments that we have the best opportunity to grow.  We don’t grow when our lives are trouble free, and things are taken care of for us.  We likely won’t grow when all is well at work and home.  Difficult times give us the life experiences from which we cultivate change.  If we take those opportunities and use those situations to learn, we become better people.  We must choose to tackle the challenge and grow from it.  The pandemic has been challenging, but it has also provided us with an opportunity to grow in how we lead at work and at home. We can choose to grow in how we positively influence others. We can choose to grow in our faith and trust in God.  We can choose to mature in our leadership roles.  We can choose to grow our life’s perspective. 

Now as much as ever, we can choose to grow. Enjoy the quote below…

 “Challenge yourself. It’s the only path which leads to growth.”

-       Morgan Freeman

Thanksgiving 2020 in Perspective

Here we are headed into another major holiday still under the “wet blanket feeling” of the pandemic. This holiday, and Christmas soon to follow, will certainly look and feel different.    We may not be able spend time with loved ones like normal, nor will we have the excitement of public gatherings that we enjoy during the holiday season. We might be  lonely or feeling depressed. Possibly we are frustrated and overwhelmed. Whatever the case, it will be a different and potentially challenging holiday season.

As tough as things may seem, let’s keep things in perspective.  We are still blessed.   If you woke up this morning in good health with a roof over your head, you should be thankful.  If you and your family know you will  have three meals today, be grateful.  If you have the ability to see and read this message, don’t take that for granted.  If you have family and friends who love you, even though you might not get to hug them this Thursday, you are blessed.  If you have all of these things you are in a very small percentage of the world from a wealth and comfort perspective.  We may not get the holidays that we are used to, but we are blessed and should remain grateful for the things we have. Consider the real meaning of Thanksgiving and maintain perspective.  Happy Thanksgiving

Listening, now more than ever…

Real conversations about uncomfortable topics cannot be held without genuinely listening.  If you follow the MMM, you know my thoughts on the importance of listening.  It is a critical skill that is needed now more than ever!  As an additional follow up to the Special Edition MMM from June 3^rd, consider the following…

·       Make the effort, it takes effort, to listen and understand the perspective of others

We typically seek first to be understood. Most people do not listen with the intent to understand, they listen with the intent to reply.  Often, we are either speaking or preparing to speak.  Think about what it means to listen with the intent to understand.  I mean seeking first to understand, to really understand.  To understand someone does not imply that you agree with them.  It means that you honor them with attentively listening and you truly care about their viewpoint. 

The issues we are facing in this country require conversations, which requires listening, which requires effort.  Take the time.  Make the effort.  Listen!

Happy Memorial Day!

The purpose for Memorial Day remains the same, don’t forget that, but this one is totally different.  It still marks the beginning of summer, but we will not be celebrating in normal fashion.  Graduations abound this time of year, but they are not being held the same way.  Vacations usually begin next week, but will they?  It is time for outdoor concerts and festivals, but not this year.  It feels different because our world is different. 

Memorial Day is the day to remember those who gave their lives for the freedoms we enjoy in this country.  Celebrate safely and remember those who made the ultimate sacrifice.  Their sacrifice puts our being stuck at home a few weeks into perspective.

Coming out of this better…

There is a lot of commentary out there on how things will be different after COVID-19.  Certainly, we are learning what we miss the most and what we deem to be really important.  Discovering creative ways to work from home and how to be flexible are daily challenges.  Of course, we are also being reminded of the importance of health care workers, first responders, truck drivers and grocery store staff.  Oh, and maybe most importantly, Teachers! 

But what are you doing to come out of this a better person?

·       Are you going to have better family relationships?

·       Will you learn a new craft or skill?

·       Are you growing in your faith?

·       Have you discovered new ways to give back in your community?

·       Will you be more serious about saving of 2-3 months of living expenses?

·       Has your perspective about work/life balance changed?

·       Do you have new goals and objectives for the balance of the year?

·       Will you bring a new level of commitment and energy to your job or your business?

·       Have you read a business or self help book you have been putting off?

This is not over, but most of the above take some time.  Take advantage of the opportunity of time. What are you doing to make sure you come out of this a better person? Think about it.

Perspective

Business is better than it should be at M.D. Anderson Cancer Center, the parking garages and waiting rooms are packed.  I spent some time there last week for a routine cancer follow up¹.  Simply being in that hospital, no matter the reason, offers a true sense of perspective.  It caused me to reconsider the magnitude of my own life problems.  Seriously ill people, who are fighting for their lives, come from around the world to be treated there.  Those of us in Houston or even Texas are blessed this facility is so accessible.  The people you see there run the gamut of stages of a cancer battle.  They are both young and old.  Some are newly diagnosed, others in remission.  Many are in the midst of rough treatments, some are just having a follow up, and others are holding the hands of their ill loved ones.  The common thread is cancer. 

When you think things are going really badly consider what others are dealing with.  We all deal with challenges, but a little dose of perspective, like the waiting room at M.D. Anderson, can shed a new light on the severity of our problems.  Even for those there as patients, the perspective gained might be one of community and not being alone.  Life is hard, we were never promised it would not be.  I have lost family and friends to cancer and have friends battling it now.  My wife and I have spent more time at M.D. Anderson with family, friends and loved ones, than anyone should have to.  The perspective gained by a few hours in a busy waiting room is powerful.  Perspective…

Be Blessed…

¹ I am a 15 year Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma survivor and I received a clean checkup report last week.  My wife and I have also both lost parents to cancer.  Please help our family raise funds for blood cancer research at The Blanton Bunch.

Perspective…

Perspective can be powerful thing.  A little dose can make one's own problems or situation seem quite insignificant.  Perspective also serves as a reminder of just how little we really understand, and how much less we really control here on earth.  It can make a person see their own challenges in a totally different light.  Make no mistake, what we do in our daily jobs is important and so are our family responsibilities, but the next time you become frustrated by the challenges of your job, your boss your co-workers, or family and friends, consider a little perspective.  How does that frustration really rank in the big scheme of things?  Enjoy the quote below.

“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” – William Shakespeare

Fear vs. Concern

An athletic department staff member at The University of Texas tells a story about his son sharing his fears with Darrell Royal some years ago.  Apparently, the young man told Royal he was afraid of graduating and finding a job in the “real” world.  Royal apparently replied “Never be afraid.  Be concerned.  There is a difference.”  He went on to explain “The difference is that fear is paralyzing.  Concern brings awareness.” 

I have always thought that fear was a normal and even important part of life and in fact I still believe that.   However, Royal’s perspective is good one.  When facing challenges we want to be concerned, not paralyzed.  We want to be cautious and aware and responsive but not frozen in fear; there is a place for fear.  Certainly, we should fear consequences of our actions and ramifications of our decisions.  Our laws and authorities rely to some degree on fear and that is appropriate. However, when facing change or obstacles in life, fear should not dictate our lives.  Caution yes, fear no.

Attitude & Perspective

Many a MMM have dealt with the power of one’s attitude and perspective on life.  It is easy to forget how much control we have over our happiness.  Does that me that we can control all of our problems and their outcomes?  Nope. What it does mean is that we can control how we respond to them, what we learn from them, and the attitude we have while working through them.  Life is not about what happens to you, it is about how you respond to what happens to you!  Consider these two thought provoking quotes…

“Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out.”

-       John Wooden

“You either ride life or it rides you. Your mental attitude determines who is the rider, and who is the horse.”

-       Napoleon Hill 

Resolutions?

Are you a New Year’s resolution person?  I’ve never been one for resolutions just for the sake of resolution every January.  Frankly, it is an arbitrary point in time and not much different than another month end; save the fact that you have to remember to write the New Year on your checks. 

A New Year should be more than that!  It is a good time to look at one’s life with a little perspective.  There is something that feels good about the fresh start of a new year.  It is like a clean slate, a new leaf, a change opportunity.  There is new energy associated with the New Year.  I do like to take stock of where I stand at year end, where my life is going and where it needs to change.  Many MMM’s have addressed the topic of change.  The point is often made that we must change to grow and improve ourselves. 

The New Year is a great opportunity to focus on change for growth and improvement.  Radical change is difficult.  More is required than a date change to accomplish significant goals.  If your goals are challenging, you will need more than a simple resolution.  But simple changes are often important as well.  The New Year offers an opportunity for a new attitude, a different outlook, and a modification in perspective.

Whatever your resolutions, goals, or challenges are tackle them with gusto and commitment.  Stick to their pursuit for the good of the outcome and the betterment of your life.  Only you can change you!

Wishing you a blessed and prosperous year!

Are you always right?

Is your way the only “right way”?  Do you often think that you know the best, if not the only, way to do something?  Sometimes our egos allow us to think that we are always right.  Maybe it is when we are young, fresh with a degree in hand, and we just know that we can conquer the world.  Maybe it is when we are older and have years of experience and just know that we have already conquered the world.  Well maybe we are just wrong! 

If you believe you always know the right answer or have the right solution you are wrong.  There are a lot of ways to solve problems, create answers, produce results and settle arguments.  There is not just one way, and one person does not always know the right way.  If you tend to think you are always right or find yourself intolerant of others ideas and perspectives, you may need to step back and reconsider.  You may need to consider other viewpoints.  You should listen more open mindedly.  You should actually seek counsel instead of dictate solutions.  You should think about the meaning of the old adage…“There is more than one way to skin a cat.” 

Seldom is there just one right way to do anything.  Even when there is, one person never always knows that answer.  Your way is not the only right way.

Perspective

Perspective can be powerful thing.  A little dose can make one's own problems or situation seem quite insignificant, or at least totally different.  The tragedies we have seen in this country in the last three months are difficult to understand.  There were the natural disasters of three major hurricanes striking the USA and its territories causing the loss of lives and untold damage. Then recently there were the human inflicted mass shootings, of which there have been two horrible episodes within weeks of one another.  The loss of life and degree of mass destruction is difficult to understand.  Some of you may have been impacted by these events.  But if you are alive reading this MMM, and did not lose a loved one, you were not impacted to the same degree as many.  It is a reminder of just how little we really understand and really control here on earth.  Our plans are not God’s plans and our understanding is not God’s understanding. 

These events, and the perspective gained from them, can make a person really see their own challenges in a totally different light.  What you do in your job or daily life is important.  How you spend your time and your resources is importantly and hopefully positively impactful on others.  But, the next time you become frustrated by the challenges of your job, your boss or co-workers, your kids or family, or just an inconsiderate driver, consider a little perspective.  Consider what they may be going through.  Better yet, consider what you have been blessed enough to not have had to experience.  Perspective is powerful.