Leadership

We do not have to be right. We must get to the right place. 

Think about it. As leaders, we should be striving to get to the right place, not just to be right. There is a right place or solution in all situations, one that serves the organization’s best interests, supports long-term success, and benefits the team. How often do we find ourselves fighting to be right? We often want to be “The” author of the solution. Our being right is not what matters. Finding the right answer is the key to getting to the right.

I Can't Imagine

I am a creature of habit – like many of us humans. I can’t imagine losing my entire home and its contents. I mean I have slept there for 25 years, raised our children there, and created memories there. It holds all our belongings, too much stuff, perhaps, but it is all there. 

The devastation of the Los Angeles wildfires is hard to fathom. I can’t imagine the sights along the roadways that I have traveled so many times. I do not know what to think about the ongoing air quality issues. We have a daughter in North Hollywood who I worry about constantly. I can’t imagine the overwhelming task of rebuilding. The loss of life is heartbreaking, but frankly, feels like it could have been even worse. 

Check on your friends in Los Angeles. Even if their home is fine, they may not be. They need our support now, next month, and in the years to come! 

I just can’t imagine…

Conversations in Your Own Head

 

Do you talk to yourself?  Maybe not literally out loud, but do you have conversations with yourself in your own head?  I know I do, and I have to believe that most people do.  Is there a voice in your head that you cannot help but listen to? How do those conversations go?  Are they positive, encouraging and uplifting? Or are they negative, downgrading and discouraging.  All too often for me they can be the latter. 

 

Why are we so hard on ourselves? Maybe not everyone is. Those that have mastered the ability to be positive and self-assuring in their own minds are likely to be more successful and maybe happier all around; It is not an easy task.  We should understand that we need to be our own best friend, our own greatest supporter and biggest fan.  Why not? 

 

I am not suggesting arrogance here. I am suggesting that we need to be positive about ourselves in our own minds. We need to talk ourselves up, be encouraging.  Nothing but good can come from that. There are plenty of negative influences out there today. We do not need another one in our own head!  Listen to your positive self in your own mind! 

Goals & Resolutions (continued)

 

 

Our goals and resolutions are hard to accomplish alone.  We need the accountability of others.  We need the peer pressure to show up and stick to the plan.  Don’t go it alone.

 

·       Is getting in shape your goal?  Join a gym; hire a trainer; find a local running group; consult a nutritionist.

·       Want to grow and improve your business?  Hire a business coach or join a mastermind group.  Seek help outside your comfort zone.  Maybe even consider a CFO consultant. (I know one I can recommend!)

·       Need to improve your Faith life?  Ask a fellow believer to hold you accountable to your prayer/quiet time or a Bible reading plan.  Join a Bible study or small group.

·       Seeking to better deal with family issues or personal problems?  Seek professional counseling or a support group.  Others are dealing with the same things you are.

 

What do all the above have in common?  First, they require you to take some action.  Secondly, they involve other people knowing your goals and supporting you.  Third, don’t go it alone. 

Life is a Team Sport

 

We are not meant to do life alone. People are not really capable of doing life alone. We need community. Humans need teamwork. The trials and tribulations of our lives are challenging. Each of us needs all the support, advice, hugs, and cheers we can get.

 

The business world of life is certainly not a solo sport. None of us individually possess all the skills required to produce results. We all have strengths and weaknesses, and we all work differently. The sport requires that we combine our different skill sets and working styles to accomplish common goals.

 

Don’t try to do life alone. There is no special prize for that! Take the time to recognize what you are good at, and what you need help with. Lean on your team! Life is a team sport!

 

*Some of this MMM material is taken from The Working Genius Podcast – Patrick Lencioni

Presidents’ Day

 

The MMM frequently focuses on leadership and the traits that make quality leaders.  It suffices to say that many of our presidents have not possessed those qualities.  In fact, their behavior in their capacity as President, as well as in their personal lives, was often contrary to the behavior we associate with good leaders.  Certainly, we have had great leaders in the White House.  Those men likely mastered leadership before moving into 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. Others have depended upon the title to gain respect, support, and followers.  Respect should come with the Office, but trust, support and a following of the people must be earned. 

The title of President does not guarantee followers, just like your title at work does not guarantee you any true followers.  Titles just give us the opportunity to earn the trust and support of potential followers.  Some of the greatest leaders I know are influencers who have no official title.  By influencers, I am not referring to the social media kind. I am referring to people who positively influence others and lead them to a common goal.

Don’t expect too much from your title.  Demand more of yourself as a leader. Happy Presidents’ Day!

Your Word?

 
We often talk of being able to take someone for their word.  A common compliment is, “He is a man of his word.”  Think about that concept by looking in the mirror today.  Are you a person of your word?  Can others take you at your word?  More importantly would you trust your own words?  Do you communicate with integrity and the intention to stand behind your word?

Words are powerful tools Trust is built on words supported by honesty and integrity, but trust can be destroyed by words of deceit and misrepresentation.  Our word is one of the few things we can totally control, can’t be taken from us, and will always play a role in how we impact the lives of those around us.  Enjoy the quote below…    

 “I believe in the sacredness of a promise, that a man’s word should be as good as his bond; that character — not wealth or power or position — is of supreme worth.”

 ― J.D. Rockefeller

A Time to Lead

What happened last week at the capital of the United States of America was appalling and disheartening.   The violent and lawless acts that took place there do not represent the values on which this country was built.  I felt like I was watching news coverage of a foreign country, much like I felt during the violent riots last summer.  We are all are entitled to our own opinion about the causes and political aspects of this incident.  We are also entitled to voice those opinions and peacefully demonstrate in support of them. 

As leaders, how do we respond to this?  It is critical that we lead against the divisions that are being perpetrated in this country. The national media feeds upon us being a divided people. It makes great news to depict drastically different viewpoints, develop momentum behind both sides, and exaggerate our divisions.  It is too easy to get caught up in the spin!  This just results in people jumping on one side of a polarizing topic and spewing hatred and accusations.  It is so easy to hide behind the keyboard and ride a wave created by media.  Social media content that serves no purpose other than expanding the divide is all too common.  We can control the breadth and depth of our divisions. 

As a people we are reluctant to take the time necessary to learn all sides of an issue, much less the facts.  I know that facts can be hard to find and I am not suggesting that we all sing Kumbaya together anytime soon.  I am merely suggesting that we need to be careful of letting the media drive the narrative. It is possible to maintain your own viewpoint while still respecting another’s opinion.  It is also possible to formulate an opinion without referring to, or posting on, social media.  Disagreement does not have to lead to expansive divides, accusations, or hateful behavior. As leaders we must encourage education, objectivity, and the understanding of all sides of issues.

I have a great friend whose beliefs about national politics vary greatly from my own. We respect each other’s opinions, listen to one another’s thoughts, and take the time to learn why we feel differently about political topics.  Our first response is not hatred. It is not a verbal attack via social media, and it is not a line in the sand that defines our relationship.  Our friendship has grown because of our ability to respectfully discuss our viewpoints without divisiveness, even though neither of us has changed our position. Differing opinions do not have to lead to hatred.  Listening to others’ beliefs does not have to result in name calling, accusations, and ridicule.

Leaders are purveyors of hope. I have said it before, a responsibility of leaders is to provide hope. That could not be truer than it is today.  Those we work with, those we lead and those we love, all need to be hopeful.  There are plenty of reasons for hope, but that hope must look past our media driven divisions.  That hope requires objectivity and open mindedness.  It needs great leaders.  America is still the greatest country in the world.

Wherever you are today and wherever you lead tomorrow, lead with hope, lead with objectivity, lead against divisiveness, and lead with love.

Be a Blessing

Have you ever felt truly blessed by another individual?  Maybe it was a close friend supporting you through a tragedy. Possibly it was a total stranger who blessed you with a random act of kindness. Or maybe it was a church group that covered you in prayer. Those blessings feel good, don’t they?

Think about the origin of that blessing.  Consider being the one that is a blessing to others. There is nothing more endearing than a genuine act of kindness.  One of the most powerful things you can do as a human being is to care for another individual.  Being a blessing to others is not difficult or expensive. It simply requires a mindset that’s focused on others and not ourselves. We have all had that warm feeling of being blessed by others.  Why can’t we make it our priority to grant those warm feelings to those around us?

As we head into this holiday season still in the midst of a pandemic, make it your goal to be a blessing to those around you.  

Friends

Last week we talked about the importance of friends.  We need support and advice from friends.  The best of friends also challenge us.  Truly great friends will encourage us to change course.  They point out our poor decisions.  They care about us becoming better versions of ourselves.  Do you have friends who will be honest with you?  When you veer off course will they tell you?  We want and need friendships like this. 

 

Are you this type of a friend?  Like we said last week, friendship is a two-way street.  That means we have a responsibility to be honest with friends.  We owe it to them to openly communicate and encourage them to grow.  Certainly, they need our support.  Sometimes that support needs to take the form of a challenging conversation.

 

Have great friends and a be a great friend…    

Friends

People are not meant to live alone. Friends and relationships are a huge part of our lives.  We may want to think we are independent and can live without those around us, but we all know that we cannot.  These times of social distancing and limited community events can be challenging for friendships, but we need one another now more than ever.  We need support and advice from friends.  We need the sharing of life with others.

Friendship is a two-way street.  It is as much about being a friend to someone as it is about having a friend.  Some friends come and go.  Others become fixtures in our lives for a lifetime.  Certain friends are placed in our lives at specific times for specific needs we may have at the time.   My life has been blessed with wonderful friendships.  Many of those have outlasted job and family changes over many years.  I can only hope to have been a friend to others in the way described by this insightful young girl.

 

True friends are the ones who see the pain in your eyes,
when everybody else is fooled by your smile.
--Kimmy Robbins, (14 years old)

Special Edition

As if we did not have our hands already full with a pandemic, our society is now engulfed in a fragile state of racial division and violent protests.  This divisiveness is not new, but that does not make it acceptable.  The senseless killing of George Floyd is certainly not acceptable, but neither are the violence-oriented protests in response.

I am a 61-year-old white male with no idea what it feels like to be a man of color in this country.  However, I am pained by the stories of the fear felt by black men walking in their own neighborhoods and driving in their own communities. If this is not unsettling to you, it should be.  Simple answers and clarity do not come easily, but we cannot sit idly by.

A few responses seem clear to me…

• Pray
• Give grace and be slow to judge
• Speak out loudly against racism and all forms of hatred
• Make the effort, it takes effort, to listen and understand the perspective of others
• Be inclusive and blind to ethnicity
• Support elected officials, communities and organizations that are inclusive
• Be thoughtful and intentional with social media posts, and be careful about what you believe on those forums
• Educate yourself with facts from a variety of sources
• Spread love by your actions in our communities and neighborhoods
• Start conversations with your friends and families, with people of different races, and with people of different opinions
• Pray

The MMM is not a current events or political blog, but a person I respect made a statement that tugged at my heart, “silence is seen as indifference”.  I am not indifferent and the MMM is not about indifference. 

Trying Times

These times will test our souls.  Our faith will be tested, but it will become our rock.  Our resolve will be stretched but it will support us. Our businesses and economy will be damaged, but they will survive.  Our friends and families may be separated, but we will hold them tightly. 

Leaders are purveyors of hope.  Now is the time for us to step up.  Our employees, friends and followers need to see hope in our eyes and positivity in our voices.  It will not be easy.  They need to hear us say the things above.  They need to know there is an end to this and better days will come.  They need to know this is survivable.  It is time to instill hope.  It is time to step up as leaders.  It is time for us to pass the test of leadership.

Let’s do this together. Take one day at a time and lead with hope!   

How Are Your Investments Doing? (part 2)

No, I am still not referring to your stock portfolio.  This time I am talking about your investment in your community.  Where are you giving back?  What organizations are benefitting from your time and talents?  What kind of an investment are you making in the community that supports your business?  Will you leave a legacy? 

Communities and organizations do not grow without the support of good leaders.  Just like we invest in others we should invest in our community.  The greatest thing about giving back is what you learn and how you grow by doing so.  We have all heard it said, those who give back get more than they give.  It is true, that is why it is an investment.  Be involved in your community.  Support a cause you are passionate about.  Share your time and skills for a worthwhile cause.  Make your community a better place to live.

We are meant to live in community.  We are designed to support others and be supported by others.  Be intentional about investing in your community.  Trust me, you will see a return on your investment.

How are your investments doing?

How do you treat others?

What do you think about when you hear that question?  There are basic considerations like opening doors for others and letting people go first in line.  There are also daily pleasantries like saying “how are you” and “thank you”.  In my mind there is one true measure of how we treat people that ranks above all others; the way we speak to someone.  What we say, and often more importantly, how we say it, is the key to how we treat people.  Our words are powerful.  Our tone can be harmful.  Our decision to talk or listen sends a message. 

Never underestimate the power of the spoken work.  Unfortunately, that spoken word is easy to use in anger and retaliation. It is the first thing we use without thinking when responding to someone.  It can be made hurtful by the words we choose and the tone with which they are said.  However, the spoken word can also be used to lift someone up, to show true love and support, to encourage and to teach.  It can communicate our deepest feelings and share our most private thoughts.  The power is ours.  We make the choice about exactly how to use the power of a spoken word.  How we talk to people is the true barometer of how we treat them. 

So, when you open your mouth today think about how you really treat others?

IRONMAN

Ironman Texas was this past weekend in The Woodlands.  It is one of my favorite weekends of the year!  There are so many moving and powerful aspects to the weekend that I always come away motivated and fulfilled.  My two takeaways from this weekend are…

Inspirational - What these athletes accomplish in an Ironman is a special feat unto itself.  Many of them have special circumstances, unique stories and difficult places from which they have come.  In every single case, it is absolutely inspirational.  Seeing what people overcame, endure and push themselves to accomplish was amazing!  I knew a few first timers and several returning athletes this year.  Each had their own story and reason for this pursuit.  They have now accomplished something few others ever will.  I am just proud to know them and be inspired by them.

Volunteerism – Each year we are in charge of an aid station on the run.  It takes 120+ people and over 15 hours of hard work to put on what we like to think of as an event for the athletes.  We do it for them and we do it for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  It is so fulfilling!  The athletes are so appreciative.  We know that what we do for them can make the difference in when, and maybe if, they finished.  But what they did for us was just as important!

We were blessed to be part of such an incredible event and to support such impressive athletes!

Consider your impact…

We all impact the lives of those around us.  It is inevitable, as is the way that people impact our lives each and every day.  The challenge is to impact people positively.  The greater challenge is to proactively impact people positively.  Never underestimate the impact you have on others just during normal daily encounters.  Try to consciously have a positive impact during those encounters.  We all have gifts.  We should strive to use those gifts in order to beneficially impact those around us.  Consider all of the uplifting ways you might be able to impact people during your day.

• Encourage
• Support
• Console
• Be an example
• Share
• Pray for
• Advise
• Teach
• Listen

Consider your impact on those around you, and do so positively.  What will your impact be today?