Voices In Your Head

 

Do you hear voices in your head? Are they always positive and encouraging? If your answer to that is yes, are you being honest? Most of us tend to have trash talk in our heads.

If you have been around the MMM for a long you know I often incorporate musical lyric references. Have you heard the Jelly Roll song entitled “Liar”? Consider these random snippets from the song.

·        I let you drive around my mind

·        You made me feel like I’m nothing

·        Saying…

-          Heaven isn’t real

-          You won’t find nobody to love

·        You try to be my friend, but your blowing smoke

·        You ain’t nothing but a liar

We all have demons and head trash. That is enough to deal with, but the song lyrics seem to be about another person’s whose thoughts and opinions running around his head. Don’t let others get all up into your headspace. Protect your mind from the negative thoughts of others.

We may not be able to train the voices in our minds to always be positive, but we can keep the negative voice of others from camping out in our heads.

Think about it and listen to Jelly Roll.

Bring Light Not Heat

 

Recently I was listening to my favorite podcast, At The Table with Patrick Lencioni, and they were discussing the concept of brining light not heat to a difficult situation.  It is really an incredible analogy.  In situations where you need to confront someone or want to make a point, bringing the heat does not work.  If you lead with heat, you will be met with heat.  We really want to lead with light.  We want the other person to see our position not hear our anger.  Heat ramps up emotion.  Light brings clarity. 

Unfortunately, heat makes good news.  Our society feeds off conflict and contentiousness, but heat breeds mistrust.  Volume, anger, cursing, and finger pointing are all versions of heat.  They serve little more than to escalate a situation.  Calm, steady tones, and sincerity are forms of light.  They may not lead to agreement, but they can lead to understanding and acceptance.  Next time you are faced with a difficult conversation, lead with light!  Leave the heat at home.

*Portions of this MMM were taken from an episode of At The Table podcast with Patrick Lencioni.  For those that are interested it is Episode 100 – Go Ahead, Enter the Danger.

Choose your Me…

Have you seen the Zillow commercial with the woman looking to buy a home talking to the multiple versions of herself?  It ran frequently during the Olympics. The ad is named “Susan’s” and you can see the company name in the background, Susan & Susan. What a great depiction of the voices we all have in our heads.  Susan has her negative me and her stressed me.  She also has a helpful me and a spontaneous me, along with gullible, anti-social, paranoid and stressed versions of herself?

Most of the versions of Susan depicted in the ad are negative characteristics.  That is so realistic! The negative voices in my head always outnumber the positive ones.  Why is that? In the commercial, all the versions of the Susan’s are seated at a large conference table.  Why do we let negative me and lazy me even have seats at the table? Unfortunately, it is hard not to.  We seem to gravitate to the negative version of ourselves.  Our goal should be to fill the table with all the positive me’s!  There are plenty to choose from, positive me, confident me, talented me, respected me, and accomplished me.  To name a few. That is who we need to listen to.  Those are the versions of you that you want at your table.

Don’t invite negative me to your table!

The Charles Schulz Philosophy

A Quiz…

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America pageant.

4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.

5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.

6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?  The point is that none of us remember the headliners of yesterday.

They are/were the best in their fields. But the applause dies, their place in the world changes.  Awards tarnish, achievements are forgotten, accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one…

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.

2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.

3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.

4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special!!

5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

This one was much easier, right?  The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, the most accomplishments or awards.  They simply are the ones who care the most.  Surely your life has been touched by such caring people.  Be sure to touch the lives of others in the same way yourself.

A great life reminder from the creator of Peanuts!

Conversations in Your Own Head

Do you talk to yourself?  Maybe not literally out loud, but do you have conversations with yourself in your own head?  I know I do, and I have to believe that most people do.  Is there a voice in your head that you cannot help but listen to?  How do those conversations go?  Are they positive, encouraging and uplifting?  Or are they negative, downgrading and discouraging.  All too often for me they can be the later. 

Why are we so hard on ourselves?  Maybe not everyone is.  Those that have mastered the ability to be positive and self-assuring in their own minds are likely to be more successful and maybe happier all around.  It is not easy to do.  We should understand that we need to be our own best friend, our own greatest supporter and biggest fan.  Why not? 

I am not suggesting arrogance here.  I am suggesting that we need to be positive about ourselves in our own minds.  We need to talk ourselves up, be encouraging.  Nothing but good can come from that. There are plenty of negative influences out there today.  We do not need another one in our own head!  Listen to your positive self in your own mind!