Leadership

 

One of the most critical attributes of a great leader is consistency.  If you know me well, you know how I feel about consistency. This is not the first MMM devoted to the topic.  Steady and consistent leadership develops loyal followers. It maintains calm and stabilizes expectations. Consistency means that when the question is the same, the answer is the same, no matter if the names and places change. The answer is the same no matter the emotional, financial, or legal implications. Dependable answers and consistent responses create a stable environment where expectations are clear. This does not mean that different times may not require different responses. It does not mean that business circumstances can’t dictate changes in policy.  However, it does mean that people know what to expect from their leader. 

 

John Maxwell says, “If people do not know what to expect from a leader, they will come to expect nothing.”  As leaders, we should want people to know what to expect from us. 

 

Great leaders have sound values and convictions. Those things do not change and therefore they are consistent in their leadership. A great leader is the rock of consistency for their team, followers, business or family.

 

Fight Fire with Fire?

 

There is an old saying that states, "You have to fight fire with fire".  I am not sure that is always true, nor wise. When the fire is an argument or disagreement, adding more fuel is not helpful.  If you take the analogy literally it would seem that you should fight fire with water, after all that is what puts out fire.  Fighting fire with fire escalates arguments and wastes energy.  It can make existing problems larger, hotter, more volatile.  The use of calming water can make them smaller, cooler, more manageable.  It may even put the fire out entirely. 

Be calm when dealing with a difficult situation, don't spread the fire.  Consider using a dose of cool, calming water the next time you have a fire to fight.

Bring Light Not Heat

 

Recently I was listening to my favorite podcast, At The Table with Patrick Lencioni, and they were discussing the concept of brining light not heat to a difficult situation.  It is really an incredible analogy.  In situations where you need to confront someone or want to make a point, bringing the heat does not work.  If you lead with heat, you will be met with heat.  We really want to lead with light.  We want the other person to see our position not hear our anger.  Heat ramps up emotion.  Light brings clarity. 

Unfortunately, heat makes good news.  Our society feeds off conflict and contentiousness, but heat breeds mistrust.  Volume, anger, cursing, and finger pointing are all versions of heat.  They serve little more than to escalate a situation.  Calm, steady tones, and sincerity are forms of light.  They may not lead to agreement, but they can lead to understanding and acceptance.  Next time you are faced with a difficult conversation, lead with light!  Leave the heat at home.

*Portions of this MMM were taken from an episode of At The Table podcast with Patrick Lencioni.  For those that are interested it is Episode 100 – Go Ahead, Enter the Danger.

Growth & Grace

 

If someone were to ask if you feel like you have grown over time, how would you answer? Are you different than you were six months ago or even a year ago?  Most of us would answer with a resounding, “Yes”! I believe we improve with age, much like wine. Perhaps we become wiser, calmer or even more generous. So why do we look at others and judge, or assume, the person they are today is who they will always be? We do not know who they will become or what they are capable of doing in the future. We also do not know what they may have been in the past. Maybe instead of being skeptical because we do not like what we see, we should have faith knowing they too will learn and grow in time.  

How are you improving overtime? Better yet, how much grace are you showing others going through the same growth process?

Volume

Is it productive for anger and frustration to be expressed through increased volume?  Do strong leaders become loud to convey important facts?  Is yelling truly a better way to communicate urgency?  I suggest that the answer to all of these questions is no.  Unfortunately, I do not always live that way.  It is a very human reaction to “get loud” in certain circumstances.  Other than large crowds or great distances, and of course sporting events, what good is loud screaming?  The person you are communicating with was probably hearing you just fine before you got emotional and turned up the volume.  Sure, voice inflection and some degree of volume change can be used in communicating a message, but out and out yelling, no.  Communication with excess volume can foster anger and disrespect.  It can undermine good leadership and it can feel demeaning and degrading to the listener.  Consider this the next time you feel the volume increasing for no good reason. 

The more tranquil a man becomes, the greater is his success,
his influence, his power for good. Calmness of mind is one
of the beautiful jewels of wisdom. --James Allen