Blame

To blame or not to blame?  There are appropriate times to seek and place blame, like when lives have been lost or when property has been damaged. Often, in matters of less importance we try too hard to blame others.  Admirable is the notion of taking responsibility for ones’ action.  It is too easy to place blame, point a finger, or deny responsibility.  We all do it to some degree, but in highly visibly situations, on important issues, and in teaching moments, great leaders pass on blaming others (even if somewhat justified).  The high road is one taken without blaming others and a wise choice to make.  Think about that at home in the example we set for our kids.  Unfortunately, our younger generation seems extremely quick to lay blame.  Take responsibility for whom and what you are.  Pass up the finger pointing opportunity and lead by example.  Consider this quote…

“The search for someone to blame is always successful.”

- Robert Half

Love & Forgiveness

As we celebrate Martin Luther King, Jr. Day today, give some thought to Dr. King’s quote:

“We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies.”

Consider the relationship between love and forgiveness. 

Leadership

We are all leaders.  Some are formal leaders with titles, others informal leaders with influence.  We lead at home, church, in our community and at work.  We lead our children, our peers and our employees.  If you do not consider yourself a leader you are ignoring an opportunity to influence those around you.  Below are some keys of quality leadership.  Embrace these and be a great leader! 

• Hope - Great leaders give people hope for a better tomorrow.

• Consistency - When followers never know what to expect from a leader they will stop expecting anything.

• Influence - People do not respond well when pushed, forced or directed. They respond best when influenced by leaders they respect. 

• Honesty & Trust - Trust and honesty are established when words and actions match up.

• Accountability - Leaders understand that followers need to see leaders who are willing to be accountable. 

• Humility - As leaders we should be concerned with what is right, not if we are right. 

• Respect & Caring - People do not care what you know until they know that you care.  

Why do we care?

Why do we care so much about what other people think?  Too often we let that thought drive our decisions and actions.  I know I do; I care.  I want people to like me, or at least think positively about me.  We should not let that motivation change who we are, or what we believe.  We should never be too absorbed by what others think.  Taken one step farther, we need to be realistic about our ability to influence.  While I am a strong proponent of leadership through influence, we do not control others’ thoughts and actions.  We can model leadership behaviors.  How people chose to act in their own lives is not dependent upon our behavior.  As humans we are independent thinkers and make our own decisions, it is a power God has granted us.  As such we have influence but not control over those we love and lead. 

Just be careful about taking yourself too seriously.  It can be dangerous…

Don't take anything personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.
- Miguel Angel Ruiz