Experiences

 

I completed my 40^th year in the post-college workplace this month.  Spare me the “old” jokes.  As a good friend suggested, I prefer “seasoned”.  My first job in June 1982 was at  InterFirst Bank in Conroe, Texas. I thought I would spend my career in banking.  Little did I know… 

Your path of life experiences makes you who you are.  They may be good, bad, or indifferent, but you are the culmination of those life experiences.  Yes, we can influence the direction of our lives.  We can certainly change course, grow, and improve.  However, what we experience and learn along the way plays a huge part in who we become.  I never would have guessed that after 15 years in banking I would end up in the manufactured housing industry.  I also would not have thought I would become an entrepreneur after age 50.  Along the way I went through a divorce, had a bought with cancer, lost my dad, a mother-in-law, and one of our adult children. There are too many lessons and experiences to count.  Many of them have provided the subject matter of the MMM over the years. All summed up these lessons and experiences have made me who I am today.

Embrace who your life has made you.  Make all of your life lessons positive ones even if the experience associated with them was difficult.  Don’t let failures, disappointments, losses and missed opportunities get the best of you.  Make it a point to create positive experiences and do the same for those that you lead!

Who am I?

I lost my dad way too early,

Who am I to doubt it was part of God’s plan?

 

His mother lived to age 98, why couldn’t he?

Who am I to question God’s timing?

 

He loved my mom and all of us so dearly,

Who am I to ask God why we don’t have him anymore?

 

He was married for 50 years, had nine grandchildren and a great grandchild,

Who am I to not thank God for the time we did have?

 

He had wood to carve, golf to play and trips to take,

Who am I to ask God why not?

 

He was kind, loved and respected,

Who am I to ask God why him?

 

For his disease there were no more options,

Who am I to ask God why no cure?

 

There were things I had not done or said,

Who am I to ask God for more time with him?

 

I never heard a bad word spoken towards him,

Who am I to ask God why not someone else?

 

He deserved so much more,

Who am I to question that God knows what he truly deserved?

 

I lost my dad far too soon,

Who am I to question God’s plan?

 

 

Barry D. Blanton

In loving memory of Don Blanton

January 6, 1935 – June 23, 2007

 

This MMM was originally issued fifteen years ago.  I will repeat it as long as I write MMM’s on a Monday near the anniversary of the passing of my father.

Leaders Don’t Know Everything

 

Positions and titles can cloud the judgment of leaders.  Often when leaders reach a certain level, they think they are required to have all the answers.  It is like they believe that with the title comes the obligation to answer every question immediately and correctly themselves.  They put undue pressure upon themselves to respond with authority, even when they may not be confident of the answer.

 

Solid leaders know that quality leadership requires a decision-making process.  That process may require time and it may involve other resources.  Good decision making does not come as the result of a title or a position, but is the result of experience, wisdom, and thoughtful processing of the circumstances.  Making the ultimate decision is different from feeling like you must have an immediate answer to every circumstance.  Great leaders are always prepared to step up and make a decision.  But in doing so, they know they don’t have to respond immediately and have all the answers themselves.  They know to consult experts, conduct research, and fully consider all options.  Our responsibility as leaders is to make sound, well thought out and rational decisions, not to simply have an answer.

Fight Fire with Fire?

 

There is an old saying that states, "You have to fight fire with fire".  I am not sure that is always true, nor wise. When the fire is an argument or disagreement, adding more fuel is not helpful.  If you take the analogy literally it would seem that you should fight fire with water, after all that is what puts out fire.  Fighting fire with fire escalates arguments and wastes energy.  It can make existing problems larger, hotter, more volatile.  The use of calming water can make them smaller, cooler, more manageable.  It may even put the fire out entirely. 

Be calm when dealing with a difficult situation, don't spread the fire.  Consider using a dose of cool, calming water the next time you have a fire to fight.